When we are bitter and entitled, We miss opportunities to enjoy growing closer to God, and closer to friends and family. Although we may be physically present, entitlement fuels bitterness that leads us to be relationally isolated.
Rather than holding on to the “never’s” in our life and stunting ourselves from growing closer in our relationships, we can choose humility and gratitude. We can choose to value the relationships we have, and deepen them through vulnerability.
3 keys to choosing spiritual growth over stagnating resentment
31 “The father said, ‘My son, you are always with me by my side. Everything I have is yours to enjoy. 32 It’s only right to celebrate like this and be overjoyed, because this brother of yours was once dead and gone, but now he is alive and back with us again. He was lost but now he is found!’”
Luke 15:31-32 TPT
In this Scripture we see the father (God) pleading and speaking lovingly to his oldest son. He wants to help him change from the inside out – starting with his thinking and attitude.
Have you ever found yourself expecting everyone around you to come and plead with you, persuade you, and pursue you, simply because you didn’t want to give up your resentment?
Fortunately, God provides us a road map to growing personally and spiritually, rather than remaining mad and stuck in the stagnation of entitled resentment.
Luke 15:31-32 provides us 3 keys to overcoming entitlement and experiencing spiritual growth in our faith and relationships. These keys are found in the father’s conversation with his older son:
Change your view of God from indulgent to intimate
“My son you are always with me by my side”
Luke 15:31a TPT
What mattered most to the father was just having his older son with him by his side, not what his son could do or produce for him. Do you value togetherness in relationships – being with friends, and being with God – over only looking for what God and others can do for you?
Rather than using relationships to indulge ourselves, we can build relationships to help others grow – and in so doing, experience intimacy with God and friends.
Embrace shared attachment over personal achievement
“Everything I have is yours to enjoy. It’s only right to celebrate like this and be overjoyed”
Luke 15:31-32a TPT
The father in this story shared everything with his sons. The most memorable and enjoyable relationships are those in which we give to others. We can do this by choosing to give our whole hearts to serving others, sharing our lives with them, and prioritizing their growth and success over our own personal achievements.
To overcome entitlement, we must redefine our source of happiness. The older son seems to have relied on his personal achievements (“performing every duty” and “never once” disobeying, Luke 15:29) rather than attachment, and this left him resentful.
When we value attachment to God and others over personal achievement, we’ll grow spiritually instead of getting mad when we don’t get what we want.
Live for God’s purpose over self-importance
…“but now he is alive and back with us again. He was lost but now he is found!’”
Luke 15:32b
Up until this point, the older brother’s self-importance blinded him from seeing what was most important in life, and especially to his father: family.
The greatest priority the father had was having both of his sons back at home, together with him.
Likewise, God’s priority is helping those who may be lost in life to find him (Luke 19:10). When we share the same selfless purpose that God is most passionate about, we grow closer to God and develop confidence in knowing that he is working through our lives to help others lost in life find their way.
